Jonesy's post about doors got me thinking.
A lot.
She's right of course.
Absolutely right.
But sometimes knowing something is right in principle doesn't mean that you end up doing it.
Sometimes, the inertia of your hum drum life prevents you from taking off your concrete shoes.
Sometimes, the scar tissue from previous battles aches and throbs.
Sometimes, your demons stand in your way, while sticking their tongues out and taunting you.
Sometimes, you're just plain stupid and you miss the opportunity.
And sometimes you're just scared.
Scared of getting hurt, scared of hurting someone else, scared that you might get what you want, scared that you might find out that it's not what you want.

I come across as a tough cookie, but I crumble easily.
I carry regret and guilt around with me in a make-believe Prada handbag (well, I'm not PPQ for nothing - a girl can dream), regardless of how many times people will tell me never to regret anything.
I am a walking oxymoron.
And I seem to walk straight past these doors that Jonesy talks about.


Guess I need to start walking more slowly and thinking a lot less.

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